Posts tagged mothering
Mothering & Borderline Personality Disorder.

Another symptom of my BPD is impulsive behaviour. Luckily, I have managed this and can now internalise the impulses purely because I worried that if anyone else knew about them or witnessed them maybe I wouldn’t be allowed to keep my child. This has been assured to me would not have been the case but when I get an idea in my head I obsess. An example of my impulsive behaviour would be touching electric hot plate that had a pan of boiling water on it to see just how hot it was. In case you are wondering… really fucking hot, I don’t recommend it!

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Our Adoption Adventure

‘It was decided that Introductions would begin the first week of March, with us briefly meeting the children ahead of time in February to ensure the match was, in fact, a good one.  Introductions started a few weeks after where we spent just over a week getting to know the children in their foster home, days out and then in our home.  The days seemed to go by in a flash but dragged as well.  We got home every evening exhausted but too excited to go to sleep straight away and would talk for hours about what had happened that day.  Eventually the day came where we packed them up in the car and drove them to their new home.  The days that followed were a complete and utter blur. I can look back now and say were just surviving day to day, we had brought two children into our lives who needed more help both emotionally, physically and academically than we could have ever imagined.  It was so hard. ‘

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Mothering Autism

Arthur was diagnosed with autism at age 3, a year after his little sister was born.  From the age of around 18 months, I was less and less able to identify with others experience of motherhood.  From the slowing down of development, the lack of speech and the extreme meltdowns, it was becoming clearer that what was happening in my house, wasn’t happening in others. 

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